"As you walk to the boundary of your understanding into the twilight of uncertainty, exercising faith, you will be led to find solutions you would not obtain otherwise. With even your strongest faith, God will not always reward you immediately according to your desires. Rather, God will respond with what in His eternal plan is best for you, when it will yield the greatest advantage. Be thankful that sometimes God lets you struggle for a long time before that answer comes. That causes your faith to increase and your character to grow."
Richard G. Scott, The Transforming Power of Faith and Character
song of the day:
it's time, by imagine dragons.
“anyone looking into my diary expecting to find a day-by-day account of rescuing children would be stunned. it is, rather, a narrative of defeats, disappointments, unbelievable betrayals, discouragements, frustrations, obstacles, criticisms and weariness. scattered among those are the few successes that have made it all worthwhile. it has definitely been panning for gold: much effort expended and tons of sand processed to gain a few precious flakes.”
john kachelmyer,romanian child activist
Today has been one of those days. And now I have to go... but there will be a super super long post tomorrow. this is a warning now. and then I will expound on the gold and discouragment then.But lets go back a couple of days.
6-29-11
Today was a holiday so everything was closed… so we had an intense Jillian Michaels workout until my legs felt like speghetti. We were resourceful and used bricks as weights. Luego estudie mi espanol con las chicas. And then we went to the Mercado. And boy was it a little crazy. Lots of people+street/shop vendors+moto/taxis= lots of noise and chaos. I felt a glimpse of what famous people go through because everyone does double takes, stares, or says something. Okay, maybe not everyone but its enough so the people that don’t are much less than those that do. Yesterday we went to a surgery hospital to talk to the doctors about volunteer projects, but the secretary took us on a tour before we told him we are here with an organization. Essentially, because we are different (American) we could go in and organize projects without an organization. Some of the girls bought some things and we looked at keyboards for our piano lessons. Along with adult ESL classes we are going to have music classes after and private lessons for the very interested and committed to learning piano. They are going to be held at the church but open to the community. We found two vendors that sold keyboards and for a decent price compared to their normal price. Katie and I put together lesson plans this morning. You can pretty much buy anything at the Mercado: dead chickens, nail clippers, clothes, shoes, fruit, kitchenware, flee medicine, tvs, dolls…etc. Some of the group bought backpacks… I am guessing for the Manchu picchu trip. I tried this honey treat from a street vendor and it was delicious. Then we went to a bakery. When we were sitting down, this young boy comes in and asks if we want to buy a pack of gum. I said I only had 90 centimos (it costed 1 sol) but he accepted. Then he bought some bread and an inca kola. Then on our way out we saw him sitting in the cubby area of the stairs in between buildings. When I saw he bought bread, I felt bad because I could have just gave him my bread that I had just bought, but because he earned his bread, I then thought he would have enjoyed that bread much better because he earned it. I wonder how some people can survive off of their income of selling sweets like the man I bought my honey treat from… it costed 50 centimos. He sold 2 other food items that also costed 50 centimos a piece. We saw a man who had a definite limp in his walk/it looked like it was very difficult to walk… with crutches, but the crutches were way too long for him. My heart twisted a little to walk by him and pass him. There were two girls who asked for money in the Mercado so I whipped out two bracelets for them. One like the colors of the other girls, but it was tough luck for her. They really liked them. Thank you for you bracelet makers. I felt better walking away from them even though that bracelet won’t help them really… but its better than saying no and walking by them. I also saw a women and her son on the opposite side of the street with a bucket out for money. There was also a woman with a child in a wheelchair on the opposite side (because we walked to the other side right before we passed her). I have been surprised because I haven’t seen very much beggars, but when they are there, it is really sad. Especially when they have a deformed limb or disability. We visited a vocational school yesterday. This school takes in children from the streets (saves them) who would otherwise be in dangerous and hopeless circumstances and trains them with skills and academic knowledge. There was about a little less than 100… the facility was amazing. It is all run by organization donations from outside the country. There were like 6 volunteers there from Germany who had been there for 11 months and were there for one more month. We met 3 classes. One was a cooking class. The kids learn to cook then eat what they cook. They all had on aprons and chef hats. The next classroom was 14-16 year olds. Then the next one was 6-9 year olds who were doing their homework, which they quickly dropped and ran to us. The kids in general wouldn’t not stop holding our hands, so we had to take our meeting inside the director’s office because the kids wouldn’t go away… it was cute. The school also helps prevent trafficking of children. The ladies who introduced us and showed us around were muy incredible… so self-less. To attend the school, they have to submit an application. And their activities are very structured. We wanted to play with the kids but we couldn’t disrupt their schedule. We are going back for a meeting tomorrow with them… but I don’t think I can go because I am going to the preschool, which is an hour later. But today I tried talking with a girl who was at the backpack-selling stand. We both talked a little bit of the other language... but we managed to communicate. I am learning that there is a universal language. Then we went to run different errands. Then dinner with hermana luzbi… of which was a huge plate of chicken, rice, and some kind of beans. Luzbi kills and sells chickens as a business. Two days ago I walked to the back to see blood dripping from upside down chickens hanging by their feet. She had just slit their throats… which she said is the same amount of pain as killing them all at once. Then she put them in boiling water… then put them in a de-feather machine. Which looks like the big metal box in Matilda that had pointy things coming out of all ends… after they get completely de-feathered by the machine… she says “pollo!!!” And that is what we eat… fresh chicken. She asked if we want a turn to kill the chickens. I passed. Sorry for that graphic description. It is morbidly interesting. She started her business through a micro finance loan. We were looking into teaching business lessons. One of the group members is an accountant student…. So I wanted to help him in that endeavor because I think that is so interesting… and it can do a lot for an individual.
Yesterday… I went to ESL in the morning. I started with the little kids… and we split them up into groups… but then the teacher asked me to go to other little kids to help her teach them. So a class of 40 kids… I tried to teach them vocab words… and it was the insanest classroom I have ever been in. The kids were absolutely adorable and could get away with anything with me, but they were so loud and rambunctious. But the teacher was able to keep them under control. I think it was second grade? At one point I asked them to repeat something to me… and they said it… I said repeat it again… and they did... then they kept saying it louder and louder until they were chanting it… I couldn’t help but laugh… unfortunately that encouraged them… and the teacher told them they would have to stay in for detention until 5 if they didn’t quiet down. They all gasped and stopped chanting (School gets out for them at 1)… so that is a very long detention. At the end there was a girl and a boy they were just beating on each other (in a joking but serious way) and they were hilarious and so cute. Then I went to a preschool… in a less off community with no running water. Two of the girls put together a project to build a preschool. The room was dusty and dirty… and they really need a room. They roof sounded like it was going to blow off… and because it is aluminum it heats up the room and causes a really bad heat effect with the sun. We taught them the alphabet in Spanish. They drew pictures of the letter on their pieces of their papers. I don’t think some of them understood the concept though. I made little Karla cry. Her sister said she was scared of me. It was really sad. I felt really bad. But the more I tried to help her not be scared of more… the more she got scared. Hopefully she won’t remember that she is scared of me tomorrow. One of the boys reminded me of yeri from cusco and I loved that. I am trying to soak in every minute. I love it here. I guess I am in still phase 1 of culture shock, but the people and kids and just so friendly. Did I say that I love it here?
7-3-11
The weekend has passed and I can say I feel much better acquainted with where we are at because I can navigate to different places. I am going to start backwards so I don’t forget things. Tonight we had a meeting with Ernesto. He has been a huge help to us in helping us know Piura, make contacts, and know the needs of the community. He is the one that introduced us to Villa Chulucanas (where the preschool is going to be). He started up an organization called AMASOL. So we are partnering up with AMASOL to do a Cancer project. Cancer is apparently the biggest killer specifically in Piura. One of the reasons is that people are not aware or they don’t wish to be aware because there is not anything they can do to prevent it. So AMASOL is teaming up with another organization to run lectures in 4 areas in universities and different communities to educate people on cancer and prevention measures. One of the biggest prevention methods is healthy eating. Most people don’t eat vegetables here, even though they can grow. Some people went to an agriculture meeting and they introduced us to Meringo trees. These trees provide a balanced source of nutrition because you can eat everything besides the roots. The seeds even purify water. It sounds like a miracle tree to me. Anyways, our job is to make pamphlets on how to do self-tests for breast cancer and contact people for a better show of people. They are also doing a walk/run come September. So basically Ernesto has been a big proponent in helping us get to know Piura. He wants AMASOL to spread throughout all of Peru. He asked up about the potential to have volunteers come from the states because he can’t spread the organization alone, but he can do it if he had volunteers to travel. Then that got me brainstorming. It would be even better to have an organization in the US that partners with AMASOL so the volunteers for that organization do individual development projects and work through AMASOL with already made contacts. I have found that everything goes smoother and actually happens through social networking. Its kind of unfortunate that we only have 2-4 months here because it takes awhile to get to know people and to grow to trust them. Like today I was brainstorming with one of the team members here about micro credit loans. I want to find people who are in dire need of some form of money assistance to improve quality of life and put their kids in school. But you can’t exactly go knocking on peoples’ doors asking if they want a loan. So we concluded that we need to start intensely social networking to find people who are ready to get a business up and running but need the money to make it happen. For example, the Bishop passed away earlier this year, and his wife needs to support their family. She has a business but we are meeting with her tomorrow to ask her questions and maybe improve the effectiveness of her business. (one of the members here is an accounting major). Tomorrow me and two others are going to talk to people about starting a woman’s group. I am hoping to also learn who would be interested in forming a women’s group to start a box bank. I did some research and Peru has a 60 something percent rate of domestic abuse. In the culture, people aren’t going to come out and say they are being abused, especially women, so we are hoping to form a strong support group so the women have some people to turn to when things get difficult or unbearable. So far we have only found 1 women’s shelter. I want to talk to them though and learn statistics and how they function. We had a meeting tonight of all our projects and we are all across the board. I feel like that is really awesome, but I don’t think that changes the most. Sometimes I wish there was a smaller group and we could just focus on one area and really brainstorm and solve problems and meet contacts for that one area. We have white boards on the walls for each day and we plan out each day of the week and what everyone is doing. Every day is full and its nice to plan out the days, but there is just so much going on, I hope it all gets done, not even done… but worked on like we make the goals to do.
Anyways, church was today. It was hard to wake up. But once I did, I took 15 minutes… not even… to get ready and go. They pulled out a keyboard… and I played the piano! There was nowhere to put the hymn book so I put it on top, but sometimes it hit buttons and then dance music would start playing… maybe even woke some people up… it woke me up. It was testimony bearing Sunday, and the men sitting on the stand all bore their testimonies first. There was a lot on the stand, so I don’t know who all of them were, but they were powerful. One of them talked about how he had a dream. It was enriching to hear how faithful and unwavering they are… cleansing. Then the congregation went and some kids went up. There was a girl that went up I was talking to last week that went up… and a boy I started talking to after church that went up as well. (they were both young) They reminded me of the youth at home… super strong. It really strengthened me to hear how they knew Christ lives. I was really impressed with some families. I can tell they are good-hearted and solid. Then Sunday school, they planned this young adult weekend with several other stakes. So we didn’t have a lesson. But I met some different girls… and understood for the most part! That part was exciting. One girl asked if I was going to go on a mission. I told her I wanted to. Then she asked why then I don’t go. I told her I have a couple of years to wait. I guess she didn’t know about the age difference when boys and girls go. Then I asked her if she wanted to go. She talked about her studies and her boyfriend and said she wasn’t sure. Then she asked what I thought. I was really touched that she asked for my advice (because I had just met her). I told her because girls have the option, its difficult to choose. I don’t know, but God knows. Then she was like, oh yes God knows. It makes me happy how people around the world trust in the same God. There was one boy who reminded me of Hilario. We talked to the Relief society president about our women’s group idea, and she offered to have it at her house. This is good because it is not as formal as the community center. I am thinking we should start several things. One can be skill-learning classes and the other more focused on emotional support. We talked for an hour after church. When in peru, do as the Peruvians do. We are going to start adult ESL after our Manchu Picchu trip because one of the counselors said if you have a week break some people will never come back. Then we walked home and I studied and slept. For some reason I was just exhausted, but I missed playing with Rosita and Jefferson and Evan. That made me sad. They are the neighbor kids me and Thuy played with last Sunday. Rosita even made sure that we were going to play with them this Sunday. Then we went to heramana luzby’s for dinner, and bless her soul, made the most delicious dinner. Yesterday was a casual day that we just hung out together. We walked all the way to the center of town, which took about 40 minutes. The girls that wanted to make bracelets never came. I was stressed about getting home on time, but they never came, I was relieved because I came home an hour and a half later, but they never came. So I was sad they never came. We went to a big mall with a grocery store to eat dinner. I had a peanut butter and mango jelly sandwhich… of which the mango jelly tasted like tea. It is weird. And some cookies. I miss hermana luzby on the weekends. Anyways the rest of the group had burger king… and we saw one of the ladies cleaning up, that was taking the trays, take a chicken leg and put it in her pocket. Even amidst this great and beautiful mall it reminded us where we were. That reminded me of iulius mall in Romania. It was a different scene, the teen scene and little kids dressed so cute and nicely with ice cream cones in their hands. However it was really fun to spend time with everyone… even though we had to weave in and out of cars because one car let us go before he took off… that put us in the middle of the road with cars that were also taking off. That is apparently the norm here, it is just slightly scary and amusing when you are playing human frogger and dodging cars. A taxi driver the day before was ticked that we bargained him down to take us home and was driving fast and abrupt and laying on his horn. But we were on the last home stretch when there were 2 moto cars on the side and he was in the middle. It seemed like the middle space was closing in…so he did what any person would do and sped right through the middle. There was probably less than an inch on each side. He was amused that we all gasped. I was in the front seat… I told him he was a very good driver…which was supposed to be a joke…but he said he was normally a bus driver so obviously he was good at maneuvering vehicles. We got home safely and paid him the price he asked for before we bargained. Also the same day, I got to sit down and talk to the lady that sits in the street with her little girl (who has a physical and mental disability). I couldn’t understand everything she was saying, which was really disappointing because I really wanted to understand what her husband’s job is. She has three other children who go to school and she sits there every day. She doesn’t ask for money but I assume by sitting there with her handicapped child she is asking for money. I gave her and her daughter 2 bracelets. When someone tried to take our picture, it really upset her and she moved locations. She had a beautiful smile. The whole time I tried to analyze whether she was being sincere or not, but partway through instead of squatting I took a seat right next to her and tried to think of all the things I knew how to say in Spanish. I want to come up with an idea of how to help these mothers who sit on the streets. If anyone has an idea, please suggest that idea. I feel like I should’ve had a translator when talking to her so I could understand what she is saying. I am going to go in full speed ahead Spanish learning mode, especially because we are going to cusco in 2 weeks… ahhhhhhhh!!!! And I neeeeeed to understand Spanish. That’s why I spent 2 full hours on focused Spanish study. Thank you to everyone who helped make a bracelet. I have given several away to kids on the street and I think they are very much appreciated.
Also, preschool update, we are going to build a preschool/community center so we can fully use it. We are also looking into building a plastic bottle school. Thank you andy! So this week, my goal is to research cost differences/plastic bottle availabilities so that we can have a plan come next week. But either way, we are building that preschool/community center. We still need funds…. If you want to purchase a bag/backpack from peru/another peru souvenir… it costs 40/45$... I will bring one back for you…. All the money earned goes to building this school/community center… so it will be well, well, well worth your money! Thank you for your support! The kids and the community really appreciate it. Especially since they don’t have any durable ‘buildings’.
7-4. Happy fourth of july! Today was golden and discouraging because of many things… yes very descriptive. Some girls always go running, but last week after jillian Michaels I seriously couldn’t even go down or up the stairs without needing something to hold half of my weight…so starting this week… it’s a goal to run in the morning times… yes mom I am thinking of you. We went to this park the size of an indoor track and ran around it. On very rare occasions do you see someone running to run… so to avoid out-of-place-ness we run around a park, again and again and again. This morning I made it through 4 and ½ songs without stopping. I really liked plugging in the music, and running in circles, and watching people go about their daily lives getting in and out of motos and kids walking to school. It was like taking a memory from home and planting it in peru…. cool feeling. There was one little boy, his sister and mom who stood outside of their house and were watching us. When I ran by he went halfway across the road and threw a flower at me… his mom told him something and he ran back to her. I got the flower and started bringing it back then he disappeared in his mom’s legs. The next time around I veered and tried to get him to listen to an earbud but he ran inside his house… so I followed him… no I try not to be a creeper… his mom was encouraging me. I see a huge poster of the jonas brothers on the wall and ask if he wants to listen to the jo bros and he hides his face. He was scared! So the next couple times around I hid my face in my hands when he hid his face and peeked out through my elbow. My goal: get a high five from him. When I asked him his name he gave me a couple of names. I admire that… but then I don’t know what to call him. So that is another goal. So then after breakfast we came back to the house for some study time. my country director was sick today… she was suppose to help us (translate) because we wanted to go around to the women in this one neighborhood to get to know them and their needs to see what things we can offer them. This is the womens group project. Well, we didn’t want to wake her, but we wanted to go out. So we thought, okay we will give her another hour then we will just venture out on our own. So we studied more… which at that point was discouraging because I felt like it was going to be a lazy day, with not much accomplished. One of the girls who spoke Spanish ended up coming with us. We went to go find the house in this neighborhood where another member was going to have a meeting with later in the day (because I was going with him so I was suppose to show him where it was) We asked this lady and she directed us to where the other lady lived. Then we decided to go talk to her first. There was also another mom in the house as well. We talked to them in the doorway and told them that we are part of an organization and wanted to do something for the women here. Do they know of any problems or hardships that women face that can be improved by forming a support system in the form of a women’s group. We told them that we have this idea but we can’t run it because we don’t know the women and their needs. This has to be their project. So if they know anyone who wants to do this thing or is willing to take this on. They offered themselves. So we scheduled to come back at 4:30. We expected to be walking around for 2 hours getting to know some women, but the first 2 people we talked to seemed really enthralled with this idea. So then we came back and studied/chatted more. Then I went to ESL with 2 other girls. These times at ESL have been the most memorable for me. I was surprised to see how well the kids learned the lessons today. Between the three of us, I think we made it really effective. For my internship, I need to make an education curriculum, so I am recording all the lessons, activities, and games that we do… and today was a really good list of things to do… including the ideas of the English teacher. This classroom was a good, small size. So we could involve all the kids. I wish I could know their names so I could call them out to answer questions. Sometimes I wonder, if my/our American classroom mentality takes over when I do this… por ejemplo, I feel like making them answer questions one by one or being called up to write on the board solidifies what they learn. I say American classroom mentality because I read this article once that questioned the real lessons learned in the classroom. When it gave the example of having to come up to the front of the room to write on the board, there are several lessons a kid is learning… one how to act in front of the classroom, the pressure to give the right answer, how to please the teacher, and the academic knowledge. It so interesting to think about. The kids were super, super cute. I love hugs. And they give the best hugs. And I love it. Then I saw some kids from the other classrooms that are my favorite… and I was so glad they came up to me and said hi. One boy brought me over to meet his little cousins. The girls that I was suppose to make bracelets with on Saturday… apparently we had a miscommunication with the times. So we rescheduled for a time I don’t remember. I am going to meet with the English teachers to go over lesson plans and activities/games for the kids… and maybe include the most effective learning techniques with my group directors help because she is a special education teacher. When we leave the school, we can’t seem to get out because kids keep coming up or they keep on talking and keep on keeping on. And its those times when I so desperately wish I could understand and speak Spanish. Even though I have some of the happiest moments, I question the purpose of going to help teach English lessons, because really when are they going to use English and why will it even be useful to them. Why do we need to invest in making a curriculum and most effecting teaching if they are not going to really even need it. Almost like foreign language classes in middle school/high school. After those classes are done, when are you going to use that language if you don’t keep progressing in levels? That was a discouraging moment… when I thought about why we should be teaching English to these kids. But I concluded that its important because it provides them that opportunity to learn, something a lot of people want. And it provides them a chance to learn from a native… I would like to learn Spanish that way. It provides them with something to work their minds. And we get the opportunity to get to know them and them to get to know us. And I am super super grateful for that opportunity. Then I came back to study and go over smart goals. Smart stands for Sustainable, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely. I made several goals… and will be keeping track of that progress. One of them is building the preschool. So far, we are banking in the fundraising money. Almost at $1000 but we still need 2 grand more. Which is really awesome considering its been a week… but still not enough. So please buy some Peruvian trinkets and bags!!!!!! Thank you to everyone’s willingness. Then I sat in for half an hour with a meeting with the old bishops wife to go over her business’s… and she has a ton… because she sells a lot of things. I am amazed. Pots, clothes, eggs, snacks, time on the play station, perfume, cologne. But then I went to the meeting a couple doors down with the two ladies we met earlier that day. This was a golden moment because they are really willing to make this work. And it really all depends on them. Our job is to search out teachers and organize in the beginning, but then it is up to them. We talked about the pros and cons, how to make it sustainable…
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